Pretty Lucy and Grandpa Jim
Life has been hectic.
Between the RUSH of Christmas Season portraits at Lerin Photography, plus homeschooling, plus housework, plus the regular demands of an at-home mom of children aged 7, 4, 2, and 5 months with extracurricular activities and commitments...
There hasn't been much time for Mom's Night Out, quiet phone calls with friends or family, or even blogging.
Last week with some family issues, I hit a wall! I started down that long and dark tunnel of despair. I was wondering how on earth I had gotten the idea that I could handle being a wife, mom, homeschooler, and business owner. I had a few mopey nights where I felt like it was impossible to keep all of those roles, and keep them well. My email and voicemail inbox are FULL of unreturned messages, my house is a wreck, I'm staying up late catching up instead of spending time with Adam, and I haven't just had a work-free day to play with the kids in weeks. I was approaching the red zone... almost ready to have a legendary Lerin meltdown!
So what did I do? I reached out.
And the responses... oh the responses! I will store them in my heart, and put some quotables here in case you needed to hear it too. Thank you so very, very much to my Catholic homeschooling mommy circle for your prayers, love, wisdom, advice, and gentle admonition.
Along with some specific advice for my exact situation, here are some general gems for moms and homeschoolers:
"Seriously, if I could go back and enjoy my kids more at those ages again, I would. It goes by so fast. Try not to let school and all the responsibilities get in the way of enjoying your kids and life. "
"Think about what God wants for your family. Pray and ask the Lord to show you what He wants you to do for each of your children-He wants to guide us. Before you make a decision about an activity, make sure you feel peaceful about it and that it is right for your family-never do anything out of pressure from your kids or friends. Our culture is way too busy-we need to be prayerful, thoughtful, able to entertain ourselves at home in simple ways."
"I have home schooled my last two from kindergarten. I can tell you that home schooling is so much better for their character and your family life! You have to believe in yourself, that the Lord will give you the wisdom and guidance to do it."
"I have been doing this long enough to know that there is burn out and there is resurrection. We burn out only to "die" ( often times to self) and then pick it up and begin again. It is a pattern. That is how we grow. It takes time and the only way through it, is through it."
"In your situation you just had a baby and are keeping up with toddlers and homeschooling. I know it is hard to have a baby and homeschool. It is grueling. It is constantly changing. Baby learns to crawl and climb and gets onto the table sitting in the middle of the homeschool. It is not boring. We must laugh and enjoy the ridiculous! Because it is."
"Time in prayer is essential. Even if it means taking your kids outside to play and praying while they play. If you can get time in Adoration in front of the Blessed Sacrament that is worth it's time. It is worth more than gold. When my kids were young my husband would watch the kids on Saturday mornings and I would go for an hour then. It is the best thing for keeping your sanity!"
"You're not crazy to be doing this at all. It is hard, and to pretend otherwise is just silly... Don't eat the elephant whole. Take it one bite at a time. Don't even take things one day at a time. Take them one minute at a time when things get rough."
"Your primary job as a mother is to ensure that your children reach Heaven. You are doing that by being their loving example *and* by homeschooling, since in so doing you are making yourself and each other their primary peer group. Don't ever give up."
"I suggest that you make a date with your friends and go do something fun so you can take a breather. Oh, and I suggest to not talk about the kids or schooling when you go out, you will see that your time away is rejuvenating."
"I don't mean to sound harsh, but you are doing something much more important than anything you can accomplish checking your e-mail or voice-mail. I find I can get lost on the computer far too easily and I am hoping to cut down as an Advent exercise!"
"We hear so much in this society that we have to have time for 'me'. My Mom died Oct 15th after suffering from Alzheimer's for 7 years. As I look back, I recall the countless times she dropped her plans for her time because one of us six kids needed her. If it is God's Will, you will have lots of 'me' time when the kids are grown. Now is the time you are building their memories of MOM that will sustain them and fill them with the love God gives them through your giving of yourself."
And finally...
"Nothing worth having is easy."
Thank you all so very much. And for all my fellow mommies, Catholics, and/or homeschoolers who read my blog... I hope you benefited from some of these words of wisdom too.
If you have more advice, tips, and encouragement for me as I try to balance my life and serve God in my vocation, please leave a comment! :)
